Reetesh, Deepa, Clare & Sophie.

Reetesh, a 35-year-old psychiatric nurse and father of three young children, has found a powerful way to combine his professional expertise with his personal values—by becoming a Shared Lives carer. Living in Luton with his wife, Deepa,  three children under six, and two adults with learning disabilities—Clare and Sophie—Reetesh is living proof that it’s possible to balance a demanding NHS career, family life, and meaningful community care.

This case study highlights how Shared Lives not only transforms the lives of those supported but also enriches the lives of carers—especially for working families and health and social care professionals looking for a flexible, rewarding way to make a difference. 

Background: A Life Dedicated to Care

Born in Mauritius and moving to the UK at age six, Reetesh grew up immersed in care environments. His aunt and uncle ran care homes in North London, and from the age of 18, he began working in them while studying for a diploma in mental health nursing. He qualified in 2012 and has since spent 13 years in the NHS, including roles as a forensic psychiatric nurse, crisis team member, and currently as a bed manager for North London NHS Foundation Trust, overseeing mental health admissions across five boroughs.

But Reetesh’s commitment to care doesn’t stop at work.

"I’ve always enjoyed working with people with learning disabilities. It’s challenging, yes—but it’s also incredibly rewarding."

When he and his family moved to Luton in 2019 for more affordable housing, they had a spare room—and a desire to give back. That’s when they discovered Shared Lives, a scheme where individuals or families open their homes to adults who need support, creating family-like relationships and long-term stability. 

Becoming a Shared Lives carer: How It Started

Reetesh’s cousin was already a Shared Lives carer through Luton Council, which sparked his interest. With space in their home and a passion for supporting vulnerable people, Reetesh and his wife decided to apply.

In 2020, during the pandemic, they received an emergency placement—Sophie, a young woman removed from her family home due to safeguarding concerns, who had been living in a hotel. After a single visit, Sophie told her social worker:

"No, I want to move in here."

She’s been with them ever since—since 2020.

In 2023, Clare joined the household after her previous long-term placement broke down. She needed emotional support, prompting, and a stable family environment.

"Clare’s mum told us, ‘It’s like having my old daughter back.’ Before, Clare would be hesitant to go home after visits. Now, she says, ‘I can’t wait to go back home.’ That’s when we knew—this was home for her."
— Reetesh

Life as a Working Family & Shared Lives carers

Reetesh works full-time in the NHS, while Deepa—also a support worker—has taken a career break to care for their three young children, aged six, four and two. Despite the noise and rhythm of a busy household, Sophie and Clare have been welcomed seamlessly into family life. Thanks to a converted annex with en-suite bedrooms, a kitchen and a separate entrance, the women have the privacy and independence they need, while remaining very much part of the family home.

“What surprised me most was how easy it was to have someone live with us,” Reetesh reflects. “I thought it might feel like an intrusion, but instead, it’s felt natural. They’re part of our family.”

Day-to-day life is about gentle encouragement rather than doing everything for Sophie and Clare. Reetesh and his wife Deepa check in on their emotional wellbeing, support them with budgeting, and help with appointments when needed—though Clare is increasingly independent. Cooking has become a point of pride: Sophie now prepares all her own meals, while once a week she and Clare cook dinner together for the whole family. Both women also volunteer locally, building friendships and confidence. Clare spends two days a week at Keech Hospice, while Sophie has found her place at a charity shop and a cultural centre.

“We provide the prompting, the encouragement, the little push they need. That’s what makes the difference,” Reetesh says.

Advice for Other Carers & Professionals

Reetesh often recommends Shared Lives to friends, colleagues and neighbours, particularly those already working in health and social care. He believes outreach works best when it’s rooted in personal connection—whether through NHS staff networks, local authority events, open days, or carers sharing their lived experience.

“I think about respite too,” he explains. “If I know someone local—someone Sophie and Clare already trust—it makes future planning easier. It’s about building a community of care.”

For him, the rewards go far beyond the practical. “It’s not just about giving support,” he says.

“We get so much back—laughter, connection, purpose. It’s rewarding for everyone.”

Have you got what it takes to be a Shared Lives carer? Take our quiz and find out. 

Take the quiz here

Shared Lives carer, Reetesh with the people he supports, Clare and Sophie.

“What surprised me most was how easy it was to have someone live with us,”

Clare with her Shared Lives carer.

Clare and Sophie celebrating a birthday at their carers house.

Clare and Sophie, the people Reetesh supports.

Could you be a Shared Lives carer?

If you have a spare room, a caring heart, and the ability to offer someone a place to belong, you could become a Shared Lives carer. 

Whether you live in Central Bedfordshire, Slough, South Gloucestershire, Cardiff, Slough, Southwark or Buckinghamshire, Your home could be the place where someone finds the stability, companionship, and encouragement they need to build a brighter future.

Find out more