What being a Shared Lives carer can bring

For Patch, becoming a Shared Lives carer has brought something unexpected: a new friendship, new experiences and a sense that she can make a real difference in someone else’s life.

When people hear the words Shared Lives carer, they might imagine that it means putting your own life on hold to care for someone else.

Patch’s experience is very different.

As a Shared Lives carer with Ategi, she shares some of her everyday life with Pip - the person she supports – and in doing so, has found that she gets plenty back too.

“I really enjoy having Pip around,” says Patch. “It’s nice to have someone to go out with and do things with.”

That might mean going shopping, taking part in Zumba, enjoying a day out or simply sitting down together and chatting. There is no elaborate programme of activities. It is the ordinary things that make up a good life.

And that is one of the things Patch values most about being a Shared Lives carer.

Sharing your everyday life

Shared Lives is built around relationships, not routines.

Rather than providing support in a traditional care setting, Shared Lives carers welcome someone into their home and community, helping them to enjoy everyday life and become more confident and independent.

For Patch, that has meant discovering how much enjoyment can come from doing simple things together.

Going shopping, for example, can become an opportunity for Pip to practise making choices, build confidence and be part of her local community.

There are also moments that are simply about friendship – talking, laughing and spending time together.

“I like seeing her confidence grow,” Patch says.

It works around your life

One of the misconceptions about becoming a Shared Lives carer is that you have to give up your existing life.

In reality, Shared Lives can fit around your circumstances, depending on the type of support you provide.

Patch has been able to continue enjoying her own interests and spending time with her family, while sharing experiences with Pip.

Pip has also become part of Patch’s wider family life, including spending time with Patch’s granddaughter.

And for Patch, that is one of the lovely things about Shared Lives: the relationship does not have to exist in isolation.

It becomes part of real life.

A different kind of reward

Being a Shared Lives carer brings practical benefits too. Carers receive payment for the support they provide, along with ongoing guidance and support from Ategi.

But for Patch, the rewards go beyond the practical.

There is the pleasure of having company. The satisfaction of helping someone develop their confidence. The opportunity to try things you might not otherwise have done. And the feeling that the time you spend together genuinely matters.

Sometimes it is simply knowing that Pip has something to look forward to.

For someone who might otherwise spend a day feeling lonely or isolated, a Shared Day or Short Break can make a real difference.

And that can make a difference to the carer too.

You don't have to be a professional carer

Perhaps the most important thing Patch’s story shows is that you do not need to be a care professional to become a Shared Lives carer.

You need to be someone who can offer time, patience, understanding and a welcoming environment.

You need to be willing to listen, learn and see the person rather than their support needs.

And you need to be prepared to share some of the ordinary moments of your life.

Because those ordinary moments can become extraordinary for someone else.

Could Shared Lives be your next step?

For some people, becoming a Shared Lives carer might fit naturally around retirement. For others, it could be a new chapter after bringing up a family, a way of using their experience to help others, or simply an opportunity to do something meaningful with their time.

There is no single type of Shared Lives carer.

What they have in common is a willingness to open up their lives and communities to someone who could benefit from greater connection, confidence and independence.

Patch’s story is a reminder that sharing your life with someone does not necessarily mean having less of a life.

Sometimes, it means having more to share – and more to look forward to.

If you are wondering whether Shared Lives could work for you, find out more about becoming a Shared Lives carer with Ategi.